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Dec. 2nd, 2008

Jeff

Nice Try, Natana, But...

Dear Santa...

Dear Santa,

This year I've been busy!

In May on a flight to Pakistan, I stole the emergency flight information card (-40 points). In November I had a shoot-out with rival gang lords on the 5 near LA (-76 points). In January I gave change to a homeless guy (19 points). Last Tuesday I helped [info]flippingthecoin hide a body (-173 points). Last Monday I bought porn for [info]delilah_girls (10 points).

Overall, I've been naughty (-260 points). For Christmas I deserve a lump of coal!

Sincerely,
run-you-fool



So I still did everything you said, but I also gave change to a homeless guy! ;P

What did you do this year, Greg?
Natana

(no subject)

Dear Santa...

Dear Santa,

This year I've been busy!

Last Sunday I bought porn for [info]talkaboutclass (-10 points). Last Thursday I had a shoot-out with rival gang lords on the 5 near LA (-76 points). In January I ate my brussel sprouts (1 points). Last Monday I helped [info]perber hide a body (-173 points). In May I gave [info]hellseffingyeah a life-saving blood transfusion (50 points).

Overall, I've been naughty (-208 points). For Christmas I deserve a lump of coal!

Sincerely,
run-you-fool

Write your letter to Santa! Enter your LJ username:


Let me guess, Isa was the life-saving blood tranfusion, Jeff was the shoot-out, and the body-hider, and the porn-buyer. And I don't know who ate their Brussels Sprouts.

So, basically, we can all blame Jeff for the lousy Christmas present.

Aug. 30th, 2008

Multiple Characters

Jeff's Still Pretty Depressed, So I Shall Meme! [This is canon, so Jeff/Isa didn't happen. Sorry.]

1. Choose a few of your own characters. Five at the most.

2. Then make them answer the following questions

 

Rita is a workaholic stress-case who happens to have some compassion to her. Book Three Rita is still a workaholic stress case, but now she’s a Mommy and she doesn’t drink (Book One Rita borders on alcoholic.)

Jeff is an overly talkative cop and a bit of an asshole, albeit an outgoing and cheerful asshole. Book Three Jeff is overly talkative, outgoing, and cheerful, but he’s less of an asshole (still annoying as all fuck) and he now has one working eye.

Isa’s life has been shit. And he’s deathly lonely. That’s really all you need to know. Book Three Isa is just as compassionate and has had just as bad a life, but he has Jeff chattering to him constantly so the loneliness is cured.

Natana is sexy sex, but her body is not equipped for actual sex. She is, however, a great dancer.

Greg is bright and cheerful and loyal as a puppy, and to top it all off he is gloriously batshit.

How Old Are You?

 

Book One Rita: Early thirties

Book Three Rita: Nearly forty

 

Book One Jeff: Twenty-one, got a problem with that?

Book Three Jeff: Twenty-seven

 

Book One Isa: I am not certain…(As of 2008 he's twenty-four, but his age is based on actual events, so in 2009 he'd be twenty-five, in 2010 twenty-six, and so on. If the book ever gets published, it probably won't be until 2010 or even 2011, and that works for me because he's supposed to be closer to Rita's age than Jeff's.)

Book Three Isa: I don’t really know. Thirty? (Author says: thirty-one, but see above disclaimer. And as for why he aged seven years while Jeff aged six, Isa’s twenty-fifth birthday was in the second book.)

 

Natana: Nineteen. Been legal for over a year.

 

Greg: Eighteen

Height

Rita: 5’11”

Jeff: 5’7”, but I WILL RISE

Isa: I’ve never actually measured (5’9”-ish. He’d be six feet if he had been nourished properly.)

Natana: Six feet. *Smile*

Greg: Tall

You got any bad habits?

Rita: No. (She’s overworked. And in book one, she drinks too much coffee and lacks the patience to warm up food.)

Jeff: I have no idea what you’re talking about. Why would I have any bad habits? I mean, really. I’m not particularly sarcastic and I certainly don’t talk too much, in fact I consider myself rather quiet, don’t you?

Isa: I’ve never really had the opportunity to develop bad habits perse

Natana: I think about sex all the time. I’m not even kidding. And I break into dance or a run at random intervals, and always feel like touching people, and drape myself over people instead of sitting on chairs. Luckily, those are all very good habits.

Greg: Do I?


You a virgin?

Book One Rita: That’s none of your goddamn business

Book Three Rita: Oh, definitely. Ally came on a stork. (Ally=her daughter. Virgin=fuck no.)

 

Book One Jeff: *Smirk* Are you coming on to me?

Book Three Jeff: *Smirk* Are you coming on to me?

 

Book One Isa: What sort of question is that? I am, but it is hardly any of your concern.

Book Three Isa: No. What sort of question is that?

 

Natana: Only because I can’t have sex. *Grumble*

 

Greg: *Shyly* Uh-huh

Who's your Mate/Spouse?

Book One Rita: Like I have time for that.

Book Three Rita: None at the moment. *Glances at Isa*

 

Book One Jeff: Wouldn’t you like to know?

Book Three Jeff: *Grins big and hugs Isa, who stares at him like he’s nuts*

 

Book One Isa: None

Book Three Isa: Well, at the moment I’m not—Jeff, get off of me

Natana: None right now. Someday. Soon, maybe.

Greg: Just good friends right now.


Have any kids?

 

Book One Rita: *Glare* No

Book Three Rita: Yes. *Fond smile at Ally*

 

Book One Jeff: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Book Three Jeff: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Book One Isa: *Wistful* None of my own.

Book Three Isa: *Looks uncomfortable* Well, yes. She’s a charming girl, but—

Book Three Jeff: He won’t tell her he’s her father because apparently he’s ASHAMED. It’s sickening.

Book Three Isa: I also have Jeff. Surely he counts.

 

Natana: Can’t.

 

Greg: Nope.


Favorite Food?

Book One Rita: Pad thai

Book Two Rita: Dark chocolate

 

Book One Jeff: MEAT

Book Three Jeff: MEAT. Also, that pizza Isa makes without cheese.

Isa: It is not pizza.

Jeff: IT COUNTS

 

Book One Isa: I’m rather fond of dark chocolate, though I can’t really have it. I enjoy most foods.

Book Three Isa: *Longingly names some Kurdish dish, then adds that he enjoys most foods*

 

Natana: Biryani! And kukra no sak! And chicken tacos! And masala macchi!

 

Greg: Chinese food. Especially with chicken.


Favorite Ice Cream flavor?

Book One Rita: Why are you wasting my time with questions about ice cream?

Book Three Rita: My daughter’s favorite flavor is mint chocolate chip. We usually share, since she’s too young for much, even if it’s a kid’s scoop.

 

Jeff: Ugh, ice cream. I’m getting a toothache just thinking about it.

 

Isa: I’ve never had ice cream, actually.

 

Natana: Pistachio kulfi with cardamom.

 

Greg: I like a lot of flavors. Especially if there’s caramel.


Killed anyone?

Book One Rita: *Revolted look* No

Book Three Rita: No, but I’ve tried

 

Book One Jeff: Nope. Surprised, aren’t you?

Book Three Jeff: Unfortunately, I haven’t managed

 

Book One Isa: Never

Book One Jeff: Liar

Book One Isa: It’s true. I wouldn’t…

Book Three Isa: *Pained expression* I didn’t mean to…I didn’t realize…

 

Natana: I wish.

 

Greg: No, but people think I did.

Hate anyone?

Book One Rita: People who ask stupid questions like this. And that cop.

Book Three Rita: Those fucking agents making Isa’s life miserable. As if he doesn’t have enough misery.

 

Book One Jeff: Terrorists. *Glares at Isa*

Book Three Jeff: I’m with Rita on this.

Book One Isa: No

Book Three Isa: No

 

Natana: Homophobes piss me off. And racists. Bigots in general.

 

Greg: *Growl* My dad

Any secrets?

Book One Rita: Fuck off.

Book Three Rita: Most people don’t know who Ally’s dad is.

 

Book One Jeff: *Sweet smile*

Book Three Jeff: Not really. My identity and stuff, but some people know.

 

Book One Isa: Some.

Book Three Isa: Ally does not know I am her father.


Love anyone?

 

Book One Rita: No

Book Three Rita: Of course I love Ally

Book Three Jeff: And Isa

Book Three Rita: Shut up

 

Book One Jeff: MEAT MEAT MEAT

Book Three Jeff: Isa

Book Three Isa: *Rolls eyes*

Book Three Jeff: And Ally. She’s such a little cutie.

 

Book One Isa: Lots of people. My Brothers and Nathanial and Jeff’s dog and a few others.

Book One Jeff: Like your fellow TERRORISTS? Oh, wait, those are your ‘Brothers.’

Book Three Isa: Well, I love Ally, of course. And Jeff and Rita, I suppose. And Toby and Ishmael. And I still love all the people I’ve been separated from, or who have died.

 

Natana: Daddy

 

Greg: My sister and my friends

What is your job?

Book One Rita: Executive of Finance Management

Book Three Rita: I was a journalist. I’m on a leave of absence from the actual journalist job, but I’m owner and manager of the city newspaper, and Chief Editor of the state’s main newspaper.

 

Book One Jeff: Cop

Book Three Jeff: Not a dime or a job to my name

 

Book One Isa: I can’t have a job in this country. I used to build houses, and I’m a healer, but I never did either for money

Book Three Isa: I’ve been a firefighter and I’ve worked at some restaurants. Right now I’m taking care of Nikki.

 

Natana: I get paid for dancing. Not much, but what college student gets paid much?

 

Greg: None


Boy or girl?

Rita: Woman

Jeff: Slime. And boy.

Isa: Man

Natana: Funny story…

Greg: Boy

What do you do to relax?

 

Book One Rita: I don’t need to relax! I do drink sometimes, to help myself sleep, but relaxing is a waste of time

Book Three Rita: *Shrug* I swing sometimes

 

Book One Jeff: Are you kidding? My life is so relaxing. I get to shoot things and eat at a diner

Book Three Jeff: Annoy Rita ^_*

 

Book One Isa: I walk most days. I used to help garden.

Book Three Isa: Play piano or play with Nikki, or listen to Jeff chatter.

 

Natana: Dance. Run. I have other things in mind, most days.

 

Greg: No stress here! *g*

What song do you think would best describe yourself?

Rita: This is the stupidest question in the world

Jeff: I’ve always been partial to Play That Funky Music, White Boy

Isa: I don’t believe I know many songs in your language.

Natana: Sexy sexy sexy

Greg: I’m too crazy to fit songs


Any hidden talents or something no one else knows about you?

Rita: Talent. What bullshit. Either you work hard or you’ve got nothing.

Jeff: I think everyone knows how well I can shoot.

Isa: A few.

Natana: People know. *Wink* Oh, but I can transport people, and me, when I dance. Most people don’t know that part.

Greg: I can talk to spirits. I used to be able to see them.

What color is your hair?

Book One Rita: Dark blonde

Book Three Rita: Dyed black

 

Book One Jeff: Plain ole brown! =D

Book Three Jeff: *Grumble* Dyed blonde *grumble* I MISS MY HAIR, DAMN IT.

Isa: Black

 

Natana: Dark brown. It looks black.

What's your sexual orientation?

Rita: Straight.

Jeff: NO SUCH THING.

Isa: I prefer women…I haven’t had many (Book One: any) relationships, though.

Natana: Just boys for me, or maybe other hermaphrodites, but I’ve never actually met one.

Greg: I like everybody.


Aug. 27th, 2008

Natana

(no subject)

Well, since Jeff isn't here to flood the journal and make everybody do memes, I figured it was up to me.
 
So, basically, the idea is to play a song at random for each question and pick a answer that fits. It's fun. I tried to get Brian to do it, but most of his songs are in Irish or Arabic or Latin or other languages he doesn't understand. *Shrug*

 

1. Are you male or female?
Song Title: Mein kolapur se aaye hoon
Lyrics: Koi maane na, koi jaane na
Translation: Some don't know, some don't believe

2. Describe yourself
Song Title: Sexy Sexy Sexy
Lyrics: Sexy sexy sexy


3. What do people feel when they're around you?
Song Title: Ye Ladka Hai Deewana

Lyrics: Kabhi ye humse ladti hai

           Kabhi akadti hai

           Karo door se chedkhani

Translation: Sometimes she fights with me

                  Sometimes she annoys me

                  Tease her, but only from a distance


4. How would you describe your previous relationship?
I've never had a real relationship in the be-exclusive-and-have-drunken-sex regard.

5. Describe your current relationship
Song Title: Koi mil gaya
Lyrics: Mujkho kya hua hai

           Kyun main ko gaya hoon

           Paagal tha main pehli

          Ya ab ho gaya hoon

Translation: What's come over me?

                   Why do I feel so lost?

                   Either I was crazy in the first place

                   Or I've just become so

6. Where would you want to be now?

Song Title: Chale Jaise Hawaien

Lyrics: Parinde gagan gagan

Translation: Soaring through the sky


7. How do you feel about love?

Song Title: Chalak Chalak

Lyrics: Shiishe se shiisha takaraa'e

Translation: Watch the glass collide with glass!

8. What's your life like?

Song Title: Choli Ke Peeche Kya Hai

Lyrics: Chunari pe neeche

Translation: Beneath the veil

9. What would you ask for if you had only one wish?
Song Title: Aaja Nachle

Lyrics: Aaja nachle nachle, mere yaar, tu nachle

Translation: Come dance, dance, my friend, you dance


10. Say something wise
Song Title: Thoda sa Pagla

Lyrics: Seyana

Translation: Wise

Aug. 21st, 2008

Jeff

Hmm...Who Should I Force To Do This Next?

 Nicknames:
Kid, Moron, One Eye, BURN IN HELL


What's an Anagram of Your Name?

Isa Boffet J

What's on your playlist?
I have a playlist?.

Three things you couldn't live without: 
1.      Isa (AS A FRIEND, NOT A BOYFRIEND, THANK YOU VERY MUCH, RITA)
2.      Red Meat
3.      Oxygen

Three Websites
:

1.      hellseffingyeah.livejournal.com

2.      falindsovsor.livejournal.com

3.      gizoogle.com


Secret Talent
Inexplicably getting people way out of my league.

What's the craziest thing you’ve ever done?
I smiled at Rita. I was unarmed.

Best American City:
Poland

Favorite Ice Cream Topping:
Burger, hold the ice cream.

Describe Yourself in One Word
Jeff

Now in Spanish:
Bastardo

Worst Hairstyle:
Blonde

Favorite Old Movie:
The one with all the dead people. You know what I mean.

Crime of Fashion:
Like I really care

Name of Your Imaginary Band? What Instrument Do You Play?:
"Fuck You Too, Buddy" ... Trumpet

Dirty Little Secret:
I wish I was as pretty as Rita.
[LOCKED FROM ISA AND RITA]That was a lie. In fact, the secret is this: I’m not so utterly stupid that I don’t think I’m standing in the way of Isa and Rita, but while I'm willing to step aside once they're together, I just can't bring myself to be the one to end it with Isa.[/LOCKED FROM ISA AND RITA]

If You Had to Have a Girl's Name, What Would You Choose?
Fred

Here's $10 ... What Do You Buy?
ALL-MEAT BUFFET TIME

Your environmentally conscious invention:
Solar-powered cars.

Your Superhero Name ("The," your favorite color, the automobile your dad drives):
The Blue Corpsmobile

What Celebrity do People Say You Look Like?
One of the muppets.

The last thing that made me laugh out loud:
Writing the answer to the celebrity question.

Quote:
"Of course there’s a way to shut me up; I just don’t know what it is because no one’s done it yet."

Aug. 14th, 2008

Jeff

I Love These Things

 7 things I am afraid of:

1. I FEAR NOTHING.

2. NOTHING.

3. WHAT PART OF NOTHING DO YOU NOT COMPREHEND?

4. But I still can’t go into fancy restaurants without losing the ability to breathe.

5. Or even moderately ‘nice’ restaurants.

6. But other than that.

7. NOTHING.


7 things that make me laugh:

 

1. Nikki

2. The way Isa says ‘ish’

3. Annoying Rita

4. Annoying anyone

5. So I’m pretty much in a constant state of laughter

6. I am easily amused

7. *Chuckle*

7 things that make me cry:

1. I almost never cry

2. I mean, onions make my eyes water

3. But that can’t possibly count

4. Seriously, though

5. I didn’t cry when my dad died

6. Or when my best friend died

7. I did, however, cry after Isa described some of the prisons he’s been in


7 things I love:

1. Isa
2. My first name
3. Beef
4. Pork
5. Any other red meat
6. Annoying people
7. My eye. The one that works, obviously.


7 things I don't understand:

1. Quiet.

2. Why European accents are supposed to be sexy. IRAQI ACCENTS ARE SEXY.

3. How Isa has not committed mass-murder yet

4. Cigarettes. THEY SMELL.

5. People who never laugh

6. People who spend $80 on shitty food
7. Everything about Rita. Seriously. Everything.

7 things on my desk:

1. I don’t have a desk

2. I had a desk when I worked as a cop

3. But I never used it

4. Literally never

5. I pile stuff on Rita’s desk to piss her off, though

6. I’d do it more often if I actually had stuff

7. Why am I filling this out when I know I don’t have anything to write?

7 facts about me:

1. I am a complete ass. More often than not, I am proud of it.

2. It has been over ten years since I saw or spoke to anyone related to me.

3. I put my mom in jail for seventeen years, and I could not feel less guilty if I tried.

4. There are approximately three things I’ve ever felt guilty about, actually.

5. My stomach is probably made of iron, but every sweet thing in the world gives me a toothache.

6. I can bench press eighty pounds, but I can’t develop any muscle.

7. I used to have a dog named Monster who was scary and huge and tried to kill everyone except Isa and her pet hamsters. I miss her. ;(

Aug. 12th, 2008

Multiple Characters

Appearances

I have a couple school friends who don’t actually own a LiveJournal but who fell out of their seats at the thought of me sharing information about my stories (the thing with me is

a – I am self-conscious. This should speak for itself.

b – If I do open up enough to discuss my precious stories, I fear I shall never shut up.)

 

The natural result of this would be lurkers. The result of that was a random, “so which of your…babies…are the pretty, pretty ones?” (I have only a few friends who know why I call them my babies. Mostly the ones who know the girl I copied the idea from.)

 

So I’m going to describe appearances. Anyone got a problem with that? Don't give a crap? Splendid.

 

Rita
A tall, curvy woman in her late thirties with strong legs and naturally tan skin that’s paler than it should be because she rarely goes outside. Her eyes are a fairly average shade of blue, or a shade darker than average, but they seem a very hot striking blue because her gaze is so sharp. Her thick hair is naturally straight and dirty blonde, but currently the One Last Star kids are in disguise, so she has cut it to a little longer than her shoulders, dyed it black, and styled it into waves. She can usually be seen in a skirt suit longer than her knees, sweatpants and a t-shirt if she's working out, and a cable-knit turtleneck and once-more-longer-than-knee-length skirt for casual wear. For her disguise, she wears much shorter skirts, black tights, and boots buckled or laced up at the sides. She also tends to wear dark green and dark purple for disguise, while in her usual clothes she'd wear neutrals or grays (or, for gym, plain white t and black sweatpants.)

Pictures to reference: this actress with slightly larger breasts and darker eyes. And, you know, a pissier expression.
Consensus on looks: Hot

Jeff
Jeff has always been a scrawny kid, and now, at twenty-seven, he's still pretty thin. But he never comes of as underfed, just young. His hair, a standard brown, tends to flop in his eyes; for disguise he cut it short and dyed it blonde, and he terribly misses his regular hair. Said eyes are the most noticeable thing about his appearance. They are light and extremely brilliant green, the sort of green that floats in front of your vision after you see very bright light. At least, one of them is. The other one used to be. Now the iris is clouded, the whites red, and it's all thanks to four very painful-looking black holes.
Pictures to reference: Well, his icon should give you an idea of what his hair used to look like, and his general attitude, though it doesn't look like him per se.
Conensus on looks: Nothing special, but not unnattractive

Isa
His Middle Eastern heritage is quite obvious, given his brown and strangely flawless skin, solemn shining black eyes with strong but unremarkable brows, and black hair. A lean, very defined face makes his lips (which are quite nice) and nose (which is really just a nose) look larger than they should. He is tall, broad-shouldered, and could be quite muscular if he had a steady supply of food. If he can help it, he never wears bright colors (especially not orange), blue, or stripes, so you'll usually see him in dark colors or light gray. His clothes are very casual, jeans (usually black, because of the avoidance of blue thing) and sweaters being standard fare. He rarely raises his voice, which is husky and occasionally hoarse, with a thick accent that belies his near-perfect grammar.
Pictures to reference: I have no pictures of people who look like him, but this is his skin tone. It's unusually dark for someone from the Middle East.
Consensus on looks: Handsome in a somewhat hunted sort of way. He looks like he used to be, or could have been, more attractive than he is.

Nikki
As per the laws of nature, she's a cutie, with dark blue eyes and straight black hair that she usually wears in a headband. Her face will probably be narrow and attractive when she grows, just given her parents' appearances. She wears solid colors, preferably bright, and she doesn't like full-piece things: give her a skirt and shirt over a dress, and shorts and shirt over overalls. Since she recently learned to tie her shoelaces, she's always in sneakers so she can show off. While generally a tomboy in dress, she likes lacy strips at the top of her socks.
Pictures to reference: This cutie with a slightly less round face, no makeup, and a narrow Caucasian nose. (Note: Nikki is not Indian; she's half-white half-Kurdish.)
Consensus on looks: An oatmeal raisin cookie

Natana
The key word here is long--long lean limbs, long toned torso, long narrow nose, long thick black eyelashes, long thick black hair. Her eyebrows are straight, thick, and low, making it look as if she never quite believes what she's seeing/hearing. Though she doesn't have a unibrow, she doesn't pluck or thread, nor does she shave any part of her body except when a dance calls for it. A half-Indian, she has dark brown eyes but her skin is more tawny than brown. Her chest, while not quite flat, rarely necessitates more than a camisole. It looks more endowed than it is because she has a broad rib cage and no trace of fat on her stomach. This stomach comes into full view when she dances in skimpy lehenga cholis (cholis are tight Indian tops that can get very short), but otherwise she goes with loose men's clothes. She is sexy in an earthy way, exemplified by her throaty melodic voice.
Consensus on looks: Natana is not remotely pretty, but she's so sexual no one really knows that.

Brian
Brian is large; not fat but tall and broad. His size and square jaw make him look intimidating, but only from a distance. Generally, after talking to him for a few minutes, you forget the fact that he could probably lift you over his head with one hand. He has soft hazel eyes, skin slightly tanned from his love of the outdoors, and light brown hair that just misses being curly. Because he tends to buy from fair-trade stores or from groups fundraising for some great cause or another, most of his t-shirts advertise some charity or another.
Consensus on looks: Plain, but possessed of an awkward charm

Greg
A beanpole with pale green eyes, Greg has delicate and rather feminine features. However, he never comes across as delicate, because he radiates energy. This energy disguises the hollows under his cheeks, the paleness of his skin, the fact that his socks don't fit. He has a pale green jacket the color of his eyes which he loves, though it is very loose on him and doesn't reach his wrists. Also, his teeth are perfect.
Consensus on looks: Really quite beautiful

Helen
Two years his senior, Helen has her brother's clear skin, long neck, and straight slim nose. Their eyes are the same pale green, but on her it looks faded. She is much more fragile in appearance than her brother, just as thin if not quite as pale. Furthermore, she tries to hide her beauty with baggy layers and makeup under her eyes that accentuates the shadows. Sans makeup, those shadows are light blue rather than grey. Her hair is naturally thin, straight, silky, and a bit limp (as is Greg's) but she has dyed and curled and straightened it so many times that it is strawlike and dead. One beauty she hasn't disguised are her hands, which are skilled and look destined to play piano.
Consensus on looks: A china doll, lovely but lifeless

Shen
A slim but not skinny South Korean with a broken arm and sleek black hair. His features are narrow but not delicate, and nothing about him particularly sticks out. He has excellent speaking skills and a carefully modulated voice, but when he's trying to repress an emotion his accent comes out, and he has to speak slowly to restrain it.
Consensus on looks: The sort of person who could be viewed as very good-looking by someone with a crush on him, but otherwise looks ordinary

In case there was any confusion, all of them are white except Isa (Kurdish), Nikki (half-Kurdish, half-white), Natana (half-Indian, half-white), and Shen (South Korean.) Only Isa and Shen have accents, though Shen's isn't usually noticeable.

Questions? Comments? Criticism for wasting your time?

Aug. 11th, 2008

Isa

[Blocked from Nikki]

A. If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone? Why haven't you told them yet?

I don’t know. It would be nice if Nikki knew I was her father, but the last thing I would want is to tell her and then die. I want Jeff and Rita to understand how grateful I am for what they’ve done for me, and let Jeff know I would never leave him. I’ve tried to tellt both of those, but they’d just tell me I was silly. There are things I regret having not told Nicole, but the reason I haven’t is rather obvious.

B. Would you accept $1,000,000 to leave the county and never set foot in it again?

If Rita would bring Nikki, I would love to leave. I know I can’t go back where I was born, though I miss it, but I still want to go somewhere.


C. You are given the power to kill people simply by thinking of their deaths and twice repeating the word "good-bye." People would die a natural death and no one would suspect you. Are there any situations in which you would use this power? (If you can imagine yourself killing someone indirectly, could you still see yourself doing it if you had to look into the person's eyes and stab the person to death? Have you ever genuinely wanted to kill someone or wished them dead?)

I could never. I’ve killed, and I still hate myself for it. (I’m sure I could imagine it, but I could never do it. I admit, I have. )

D. What would constitute a "perfect" evening for you?

Yes, there are things I would change, but I cannot change them. Jeff and Nikki and Rita are here, the food is plentiful, there is a couch and a piano and every evening I am warm and Jeff is beside me. Perfect does not exist, but joy does. And I have joy.

 

E. Would you rather be extremely successful professionally and have a tolerable yet unexciting private life, or have an extremely happy private life and only a tolerable and uninspiring professional life? (Since so many people place great emphasis on a happy private life, why do people often wind up putting more energy into their professional lives? If you feel that your private life is more important, do your priorities support this? Are you simply unwilling to admit that work is more important? Do you use work as a substitute? Do you hope professional success will somehow magically lead to personal happiness?)

I don’t understand this obsession with money and career. A tolerable professional life would be lovely. An extremely happy private life is what I have, and I have not even imagined as much. In short, I’m being offered more than I have, or want. (Again, I do not understand. Perhaps they do. I do not; it hardly did as much for Rita.)

F. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one ability or quality, what would it be?

Jeff’s teleportation suggestion does sound nice. Or…

I can heal bodies, and I can rebuild houses, but I cannot heal minds or souls, nor can I rebuild lives. I don’t know what ability would let me do such a thing, and I don’t know if it’s within my right to do so, but…I wish I could.

G. You have the chance to meet someone with whom you can have the most satisfying love imaginable - the stuff of dreams. Sadly, you know that in six months the person will die. Knowing that pain that would follow, would you still want to meet that person and fall in love? What if you knew your lover would not die, but instead would betray you? (In love, is intensity or permanence more important? How much do you expect from someone who loves you? What would make you feel betrayed by your mate - indifference? Dishonesty? Infidelity?)

No. I have had a relationship that ended and I do not regret it at all. I have had loved ones who died and I treasure their memory. But I would not willingly form a new relationship knowing it would end in death. And there is too much at risk for me to be with someone who would betray me. (I rather prefer permanence; I could not be in a relationship that I knew would be a mere casual game, however enjoyable it was. I’ve never had expectations; I never expected I’d fall in love, and somehow I stumbled upon people who defy expectations. I would feel betrayed by infidelity, hurt and surprised by indifference, and my response to dishonesty would depend on the lie.)


H. Do you prefer being around men or women? Do your closest friends tend to be men or women?

I am used to being around men, and Jeff and my Brothers are men, but I do not have anything against women.

I. Would you be willing to murder an innocent person if it would end hunger in the world? (Would it torment you more to have the blood of an innocent person on your hands or to know you let millions of people die? What do you think of people who achieve great things by compromising their principles? Many are will to give their own lives but not to take the life of another; is anything so important you would sacrifice your very soul for it?)

I…I wish I could. I wish. But I couldn’t. (It torments me enough to have vile blood on my hands; the blood of an innocent I could not tolerate. I don’t understand how people can abandon their principles so easily. I would sacrifice my soul for my daughter.)

J. What is you most treasured memory?

I have many fond memories, but I cannot cling to those.

K. If you knew there would be a nuclear war in one week, what would you do?

I don’t know.


L. What is the greatest accomplishment of your life? Is there anything you hope to do that is even better?

Escaping from prison. I would like to find a way to help someone; I have always helped people, and now I have no way to.

M. One would be the one material item you would save during a fire?

I don’t suppose I could save the piano.

N. You are offered $1,000,000 for the following act: before you are ten pistols - only one of which is loaded. You must pick up one of the pistols, point it at your forehead, and pull the trigger. If you can walk away you do so a millionaire. Would you accept the risk?

Money is not worth a life.

O. If you could choose the manner of your death, what would it be? (Would you die a hero's death, die a martyr to some great cause, die in a natural catastrophe, or die peacefully? Why is it so tempting to have death catch us in our sleep?)

I have always thought that, some day, faced with an innocent death, a soul unready to die, I would revive someone at the cost of my own life. It is rather foolish of me to put this here when I know how Jeff will react, but it is true. And how else can I die? I do not want to starve. Nothing else would kill me. (A peaceful death is a glorious thought…any thought of peace is glorious.)


P. For what in your life do you feel most grateful?

So many things. My Brothers, though they are not with me anymore. Nicole, though she is gone. Jeff and Rita and Toby and Ishmael. Of course, I am most grateful for Nikki.

Q. How forgiving are you?

I have never had to forgive someone, because I have never blamed anyone for something. Even the destruction of the country I come from cannot be the burden of one conscience.

R. When you tells a story, do you often exaggerate or embellish it? If so, why?

Never.

S. How much do you feel in control of the course of your life?

No one can really control their lives. They can only try.

T. Is it easy for you to ask for help when you need it? Will you ask for help?

I would not be typing right now, were it not for the help of others. Most likely, I would be in a cage. Or I would have starved before I was ever placed in a cage.

U. Would you like to be famous? In what way?

I would rather not.

V. What are your most compulsive habits? Do you regularly struggle to break those habits?

Do I have compulsive habits? It pains me to see pain that I cannot heal, but I do not consider this a habit.


W. What do you strive for most in your life: accomplishment, security, love, power, excitement, knowledge, or something else?

Freedom. And security would be nice.

X. How easily embarrassed are you?

Certainly I have been embarrassed, but it is rare.

Y. Does the fact that you has never done something before increase or decrease its appeal to you?

It depends. I have no fear of doing things I have no experience with, but I do not seek out activities just because they are new.

Z. How many different sexual partners have you had? Would you prefer to have had more or fewer?

Two. While I would like to say I have only loved one person, the fact is that I would not take back either relationship. I care for Rita a great deal, and if it were not for my being with her, Nikki would never have been born. And Jeff is…wonderful.

Aug. 10th, 2008

Jeff

A bee see de ee fuck gee

A. If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone? Why haven't you told them yet?

I’d probably be pretty annoyed with myself for not telling Nikki who her father is. I haven’t told her yet because he’s so nervous about it. Also, I’ve told Isa I love him about 400 times, but I haven’t told him I’m sorry. And I guess the reason I haven’t done that…I don’t know. Because he might say I shouldn’t apologize, which would be the most depressing thing ever.

B. Would you accept $1,000,000 to leave the county and never set foot in it again?

Are you kidding? I’d leave in a heartbeat if I could take Isa with me. (Assuming Rita and Nikki would come.) And surely $1,000,000 is more than enough for the fake passport.


C. You are given the power to kill people simply by thinking of their deaths and twice repeating the word "good-bye." People would die a natural death and no one would suspect you. Are there any situations in which you would use this power? (If you can imagine yourself killing someone indirectly, could you still see yourself doing it if you had to look into the person's eyes and stab the person to death? Have you ever genuinely wanted to kill someone or wished them dead?)

Yes, I’d kill all the fucking agents who want Isa. (Yes, I can, and I enjoy the thought. Yes, I have wanted very badly to kill David.)

D. What would constitute a "perfect" evening for you?

Currently, my typical evening is perfect:

Playing with Nikki and Toby. Annoying Rita. Eating (there are a lot of foods that could fit into a perfect dinner. Right now I could go for some steak) with Isa and Nikki (and probably Rita because, well, she’s probably paying.) Sleeping with Isa, in both senses of the word.

A really perfect evening would be all of that, minus the knowledge that Isa’s probably scared shitless of what might happen tomorrow. Not that I let that ruin my fun.


E. Would you rather be extremely successful professionally and have a tolerable yet unexciting private life, or have an extremely happy private life and only a tolerable and uninspiring professional life? (Since so many people place great emphasis on a happy private life, why do people often wind up putting more energy into their professional lives? If you feel that your private life is more important, do your priorities support this? Are you simply unwilling to admit that work is more important? Do you use work as a substitute? Do you hope professional success will somehow magically lead to personal happiness?)

Definitely private life. I’ve done the successful professional thing. Boring as shit. Right now I am unemployed and mooching off my boyfriend’s ex and everything is absolutely great. (Because people think money is a cure to everything. My top priority is keeping Isa safe. I am fully willing to admit work is less important. Nope. Nope.)

F. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one ability or quality, what would it be?

How do I know? Do you mean I get to pick? Like a superpower or something? Probably teleportation. That way Isa could live a normal life, and if he ever got captured I’d just teleport him out of there.

G. You have the chance to meet someone with whom you can have the most satisfying love imaginable - the stuff of dreams. Sadly, you know that in six months the person will die. Knowing that pain that would follow, would you still want to meet that person and fall in love? What if you knew your lover would not die, but instead would betray you? (In love, is intensity or permanence more important? How much do you expect from someone who loves you? What would make you feel betrayed by your mate - indifference? Dishonesty? Infidelity?)

I already have Isa, you know. If I knew he was going to die in six months…yeah, it would hurt like a son of a bitch, but it’s not like I’d leave him. Betray me like how? Cheating on me? That would be pretty silly when I keep telling him how ok it would be if he were with someone else. By some weird reversal of the agents want from me, in which he turned me in for his own safety? Because I can’t picture that. I guess I wouldn’t be with him if I knew that would happen. (Intensity; nothing lasts forever anyway. I don’t think I expect that much…mostly just love, and probably honesty, or at least willingness to tell me if there’s something the person isn’t willing to share instead of making up a cover story. I don’t think I’d feel betrayed over indifference—sad, definitely, but not betrayed. Dishonesty? Yeah, betrayed, probably hurt. I already said my opinions on fidelity.)

H. Do you prefer being around men or women? Do your closest friends tend to be men or women?

No preferences. The two closest friends I’ve ever had were Nicole and Isa, so it seems pretty even.

I. Would you be willing to murder an innocent person if it would end hunger in the world? (Would it torment you more to have the blood of an innocent person on your hands or to know you let millions of people die? What do you think of people who achieve great things by compromising their principles? Many are will to give their own lives but not to take the life of another; is anything so important you would sacrifice your very soul for it?)

Probably. But it depends on who the person was; I couldn’t kill a refugee or a little kid, but a total stranger who had lived a good life I probably could. (I’ve probably got plenty of innocent blood on my hands that I don’t know about. I don’t really think anyone can go without compromising their principles; even Isa did to take down these terrorists, and he’s one of the only principled people I’ve met. I don’t believe in souls, but if I did, yeah, there are things I’d sacrifice it for.)

J. What is you most treasured memory?

Right after I got tortured—long story—and Rita and Isa had found me, I asked Isa if he trusted me now, and he was confused; he didn’t think he had ever not trusted me. Oh my god, I’m a sap.

K. If you knew there would be a nuclear war in one week, what would you do?

You mean there ISN’T going to be a nuclear war in one week?

L. What is the greatest accomplishment of your life? Is there anything you hope to do that is even better?

Helping Nicole was, in my opinion, a pretty big accomplishment. So was keeping Isa safe, though I’m sure he’s more responsible for it than I am. But I’d say uniting him with his daughter was the best. Yes, I want to make the safety and reunion permanent.

M. One would be the one material item you would save during a fire?

Toby. Poor blind thing probably couldn’t find his way out on his own.

N. You are offered $1,000,000 for the following act: before you are ten pistols - only one of which is loaded. You must pick up one of the pistols, point it at your forehead, and pull the trigger. If you can walk away you do so a millionaire. Would you accept the risk?

Fuck yeah. I’d just do it for the thrill.

O. If you could choose the manner of your death, what would it be? (Would you die a hero's death, die a martyr to some great cause, die in a natural catastrophe, or die peacefully? Why is it so tempting to have death catch us in our sleep?)

I used to have all sorts of clever ideas for this, but right now I kind of like the ‘shove-a-kid-out-of-the-way-of-a-speeding-truck’ way, instead of anything fun. (Ugh, just hearing the word hero makes me rethink it. Because we humans are wimps. WIMPS I SAY.)

P. For what in your life do you feel most grateful?

I think this is obvious.

Q. How forgiving are you?

Depends. There are people I’m probably never going to meet who I’ll never fucking forgive, but I’m not really a fan of grudges.

R. When you tells a story, do you often exaggerate or embellish it? If so, why?

Have you SEEN my life? No embellishments necessary.

S. How much do you feel in control of the course of your life?

Less in control now than I used to, but I don’t mind.

T. Is it easy for you to ask for help when you need it? Will you ask for help?

Sure. Sure.

U. Would you like to be famous? In what way?

NO. IT’S CRAP. I JUST WANT TO BE POOR AND NAMELESS AND WELL-FED, DAMN IT.

V. What are your most compulsive habits? Do you regularly struggle to break those habits?

Ok, I have to agree with Rita and say I’m kind of insatiable on the whole Isa thing; generally I’ll just pounce on him, regardless of what he’s doing or however large the nearest fire is. No, I kind of like the habit.

W. What do you strive for most in your life: accomplishment, security, love, power, excitement, knowledge, or something else?

It’s always been excitement.

X. How easily embarrassed are you?

Not at all.

Y. Does the fact that you has never done something before increase or decrease its appeal to you?

Definitely increase.

Z. How many different sexual partners have you had? Would you prefer to have had more or fewer?

Eh, not many. I don’t really care; I’m quite happy with the sexual partner I have at the moment, and given that I’m not stupid enough to not use a condom, the rest doesn’t much matter.

Aug. 8th, 2008

Isa

Culture Shock

NOTE: ALL OF THIS IS WRITTEN FROM AUTHOR'S POINT-OF-VIEW, NOT ISA'S

By this point in the journal Isa has lived in the US for six years and adjusted considerably, so this is more for when he first showed up.

What is your character’s name? What language is this name? What is its meaning?

His name is Isa, which is technically an Arabic name, but the meaning is derived from the Hebrew word Asa, which means healer.

 

What is your character’s religion? How common is this religion? What are some rules (ie veils in Islam or dietary restrictions) associated with this religion? How closely does he follow them?

Not all Muslim women wear veils, but—Isa is a Yezidi, which is about as uncommon as it gets. They’re pretty much extinct, if you can use that term in regards to a religious group. Some rules are not eating lettuce and not wearing blue. He would like to follow these, but being dirt poor and a refugee/fugitive to boot, he can’t. When he is able to choose what he eats and wears, he does follows the rules.

 

What is your character’s ethnicity? How has this affected his life?

Isa is a Kurd, which it is safe to say affected him a whole lot during the Kurdish genocide.

 

What is your character’s level of education?

He was taught by other members of this group (another of my characters prefers the word ‘cult’) so he didn’t get typical primary school to secondary school to college education. He did, however, get a good education, focusing on math and healing and history and physiology. This ended when he was seventeen, since he was captured. He still has a fairly large desire to learn.

 

Describe your character’s political beliefs.

Isa is a socialist and a pacifist. He’s skeptical of governments and stubbornly against killing anyone, including terrorists. His firm commitment to human rights and stuff like equality probably seems naïve given how shitty his life has been, but he isn’t naïve. He doesn’t believe the world as it is right now is about to become a utopia anytime soon. But he also has, cheesy as it sounds, a deep love for humankind. And look at it this way: it’s either that or suicide.

 

What part of the world does your country come from?

The Middle East. Specifically Iraq. More specifically, Iraqi Kurdistan, though he’s a nomad so I’m sure he’s been all over Iraq.

 

What is the primary religion of this country?

Islam. Specifically Shia Islam.

 

What is the primary ethnicity of this country?

Arab.

 

How long did your character live in this country?

I don’t so much know. Like I said, he was seventeen when he was first captured, but his healing powers weren’t discovered until after that, and given the war and all he was probably used within the country to heal. I think he was transferred out (well, sold) around 2004, but neither he nor I know his exact age at the time.

 

What job did your character hold while living in this country?

The members of the group were nomadic and socialists and did not believe in paltry stuff like making a profit. Isa was brought into it as a really little child, so he he’s never held a paid job. He went around with the other members (his “Brothers”) rebuilding houses that had been destroyed during the ethnic cleansing. Isa, who has healing powers, also did a lot of healing. I’d consider both of these jobs, even if he wasn’t paid.

 

What country does your character currently live in?

The United States of Amrika. No, wait, America.

 

What is the primary religion of this country?

Again? Christianity. Don’t ask me what type of Christianity because I don’t know.

 

What is the primary ethnicity of this country?

Caucasian.

 

What circumstances brought your character to this country?

After Isa’s healing powers were discovered, he was used as a tool. He managed to escape and basically stowed away on the first ship he could find. Then he illegally went from country to country until he was out of harm’s way.

 

What are his or her three favorite changes?

1)      The lack of daily air raids.

2)      The unlikelihood of illegal house demolitions.

3)      The plentiful water and electricity.

 

What does he or she miss about his own country?

1)      The food. Isa has unfortunately found himself in a city where there is little ethnic cuisine, and certainly nothing Kurdish. And even if the cuisine were the same, the food just tastes different. Also, the only times he hasn’t eaten family style were the times in solitary confinement.

2)      The feeling of brotherhood. Isa is a very lonely person. He’s pretty reserved himself, but he craves human contact. Aside from, again, solitary confinement, he’s used to being around people. He’s also used to expressions of physical affection between men, and we all know how THAT’S perceived in the US. Since he isn’t about to go up and throw his arms around some random guy, he’s pretty isolated.

3)      The people. Specifically, his Brothers.

 

What does he or she not understand about the new country?

-         The incredible amount of food people waste. Isa never wastes food. Granted, he rarely has food to waste.

-         The way women dress. Iraq is a pretty secular place (well, was) and it isn’t like women went around fully veiled, but they didn’t go around in miniskirts and midriff-bearing tops.

-         The fact that there are no visible stars. It’s a mix of pollution and lights being on all night, but it’s totally foreign to him.

 

What is his current job?

As an illegal immigrant, he has a lack of options. He works in a diner; he's underpaid, but he's just grateful to be working. Later he becomes a firefighter, but he has to quit after a bad fire in which he heals a bunch of people, because then he has to run like heck lest someone figures out how he managed to do that.

 

What acquaintances had he made since he has arrived? How did they meet? What is their job? What about them is unique to the culture of the new country?

-         Rita Hason. They met at a bar. She is a workaholic businesswoman with a coffee addiction, which seems pretty darn American to me.

-         Jeff Tobias. Their first meeting consisted of Jeff trying to arrest Isa. As that may suggest, Jeff is a cop. He considers math a form of brainwashing, does that count?

-         Nicole. She ran into him with her car. She’s currently unemployed, though she wants to be a music teacher. As for uniquely American…well, her vegetarianism is definitely not what you’d see in the Middle East, but you see it in India, so that doesn’t count. I don’t know, really.

Aug. 5th, 2008

Shen

Greg is so enthusiastic

I'm all in favor of keeping dangerous weapons out of the hands of fools. Let's start with typewriters.

Solomon Short

The only man who is really free is the one who can turn down an invitation to dinner without giving an excuse.

Jules Renard (1864 - 1910)

When your work speaks for itself, don't interrupt.

Henry J. Kaiser (1882 - 1967)

Life grants nothing to us mortals without hard work.

Horace

Fortune can, for her pleasure, fools advance,
And toss them on the wheels of Chance.

Juvenal (55 AD - 127 AD)  

Multiple Characters

It Wasn't Even Jeff's Idea This Time

This was at Rita's little girl's request. She is of the impression that it is "awesome," but she doesn't know what any of the quotes mean (to be fair, I can only interpret) so...essentally, I go to a page of quotes and keep clicking until five quotes catch my interest:

 

One of the first duties of the physician is to educate the masses not to take medicine.

Sir William Osler (1849 - 1919)

Disbelief in magic can force a poor soul into believing in government and business.

Tom Robbins (1936 - )

You can't separate peace from freedom because no one can be at peace unless he has his freedom.

Malcolm X

Patriotism is the willingness to kill and be killed for trivial reasons.

Bertrand Russell

You can't say that civilizations don't advance, however, for in every war they kill you in a new way.

Will Rogers (1879 - 1935)

 

Jul. 29th, 2008

Rita

ALL RIGHT. HERE IT IS. NOW GET OFF MY BACK.

[Note from Jeff]I edited out a whole lot of grumbling and avoidance and and blatant denial. We all know Rita hates wasting time, after all. Of course, she still copped out on most of them.[/note from Jeff]

 

1. The guy you would take to meet your parents: …I might take Jack just to spite my father.


2. The one girl you would do: And why exactly would I only sleep with one girl? Just because I’m a woman I’m suddenly totally opposed to sleeping with a female? Did the writer of this not consider that they may be dealing with a lesbian? If I have trouble putting down a woman, it’s because of age. [Note from Jeff]That’s what she wrote, but she said a lot more. I think the fact that everything here is guy got to her, because I have gathered that Claire or Alice or Judith would all be candidates if it weren’t for the age and Rita being Rita. And that apparently she likes this Ismaili woman who she’s friends with. We should get Rita in angry-bleeding-heart mode more often.[/note from Jeff]


3. The guy you'd have sex with in your parents’ bed: Isa

4. The girl you'd take to the mall: My daughter.


5. Your male BFF: I kind of like Brian.

6. Your female BFF: Claire is the only reasonable female around here.


7. Your gay BFF: Ah…I don’t know the orientations of most people here.

8. The guy who'd take you to prom: Proms are an enormous waste of time. And I am almost forty, for the love of humanity. (Note from author: this whole journal is, for the One Last Star folks, almost seven years after the beginning of One Last Star)


9. Your big brother: I’m the oldest person here.

10. The guy you'd marry: [Edit from Jeff because she wouldn’t answer the damn thing]I-FUCKING-SA[/edit from Jeff because she wouldn’t answer the damn thing]

11. The two guys you'd have a threesome with: …I suppose if Jeff and I were both with Isa and he didn’t actually touch me, it would be all right.

12. The girl and guy you'd have a threesome with: Finn and Judith.

13. The guy you'd go clubbing with: That would be a lovely excuse to smash Jeff’s head.

14. The guy you'd have angry hot sex with: …[Edit from Jeff]It’s David. Seriously. He is perfect for hot angry sex.[/edit from Jeff]

15. The girl you'd call after a break-up: Iya

16. The guy you'd have sex with when no one else is around: [Edit from Jeff]Jack! Hey, that fucking hurt! At least I didn’t put myself.[/edit from Jeff]

17. The guy you'd have sex with when you're cheating on your hubby/boyfriend: I’m currently single.

18. The guy you'd tell all your secrets: Brian (note from the author: everyone tells their secrets to Brian.
8D)

19. The person you'd commit a murder with: Jeff, or perhaps Natana


20. The boy you'd go to the gym with: Why does this one say boy? Does it have to be someone very young? Jeff, I suppose.

21. Your shoulder to cry on: I don’t need to cry on anyone’s shoulder. [Edit from Jeff]See what a liar she is?[/edit from Jeff]

22. The guy you'd ask to beat up your cheating boyfriend: Why on EARTH would I do something like that?

23. The guy you'd always come back to: Well, I suppose—shut up, Jeff—yes, it’s Isa.

24. The guy you'd die for: Isa

25. The guy who'd get you pregnant: This one is blatantly obvious and I think we all know it.

Natana

(no subject)

THIS IS BLATANTLY GEARED TOWARDS STRAIGHT WOMEN (or maybe gay men, but STEREOTYPICALLY FEMININE GAY MEN) AND THAT IS NOT REMOTELY FAIR.

 

1. The guy you would take to meet your parents: Brian. He and my dad could discuss old historical/mythical/philosophical stuff. Maybe Dad will teach him Hindi or Kacchi.


2. The one girl you would do: Ok, in real life, my friend Eisha would be my top choice. Of the crazies, I kind of want to sleep with Rita.


3. The guy you'd have sex with in your parents’ bed: I’d say Taylor, but I am SO FUCKING MAD AT THAT ASS RIGHT NOW. Maybe Greg would want sex in my parents’ bed.

4. The girl you'd take to the mall: Lilly. I just want to buy her things.


5. Your male BFF: Obviously Brian!

6. Your female BFF: Alice. She’s great.


7. Your gay BFF: Anyone here gay?

8. The guy who'd take you to prom: I bet Brian would have. But I kind of agree with Jeff that going with Jack and blowing stuff up would be great.


9. Your big brother: I want Isa to be my brother.

10. The guy you'd marry: What are you, one of my aunts? I’m not in a marriage mood thanks.


11. The two guys you'd have a threesome with: Jeff and Isa, unless Isa’s uncomfortable with it. Jack and Greg would be fun, but they’re not really my taste.

12. The girl and guy you'd have a threesome with: Finn and Judith. They are fucking sexy. Plus they’d totally be up for it (wouldn’t you two be up for it?) And they already like each other, which is kind of important in these situations.

13. The guy you'd go clubbing with: Greg.

14. The guy you'd have angry hot sex with: I really want to meet and screw this David guy.

15. The girl you'd call after a break-up: Probably Ija. She seems pretty understanding.

16. The guy you'd have sex with when no one else is around: Calhoun. He radiates sex. I cannot be the only one who thinks so.


17. The guy you'd have sex with when you're cheating on your hubby/boyfriend: Jeff, if he wasn’t with Isa at the time.

18. The guy you'd tell all your secrets: Obviously Brian.

19. The person you'd commit a murder with: Claire. You can just tell she’s great at murder.


20. The boy you'd go to the gym with: Jack. I can just see him goofing off and fooling with the machines.

21. Your shoulder to cry on: I don’t really know. I’ve never cried on anyone’s shoulder. Ija and Lacey are really great, but I don’t know them well enough to cry on their shoulders. I wouldn’t cry on Brian’s because he’d be all sad.

22. The guy you'd ask to beat up your cheating boyfriend: Oh, pffft, like I can’t beat anyone up on my own.

23. The guy you'd always come back to: My dad. What? You think I’m going to get tied down by a crush?

24. The guy you'd die for: I wouldn’t really die for anyone my age, only my dad or a little kid.

25. The guy who'd get you pregnant: I can’t get pregnant. But we’ve been ignoring my physical capabilities anyway. So maybe Isa. He seems like a really good dad.

Jeff

(no subject)

Ok, so this thing looked really frigging fun. I’m doing it for the other crazies here. And the hellseffingyeah crazies, because they kick ass. (Note from the author: it's actually because I got this meme from madcap-shiny in the first place, and because she was all excited when I said I'd do it. captain-catfish's babies also kick ass. In fact, they're there a couple times anyway because Jeff insisted on it.)

I have been informed that I can only write Isa five times. That is totally unfair, but I’ll live with it.

 

1. The guy you would take to meet your parents: Um, is this code for someone I would kill and/or throw in jail for life? Because the answer is David.

2. The one girl you would do: Is Natana a girl? No? Well, probably Judith.

3. The guy you'd have sex with in your parents bed: …what bed?

4. The girl you'd take to the mall: [Name blocked] And I would buy her everything she wants.


5. Your male BFF: You know what, Natana keeps getting excluded. I’M PUTTING NATANA (even though it would be Jack for male.)

6. Your female BFF: Obviously Nicole. (Note from the author: also, Lacey.)

7. Your gay BFF: No such thing as gay. Unless you mean happy. Greg.

8. The guy who'd take you to prom: I don’t know. I’ve never been to a prom. Probably Jack; we could create all sorts of chaos.

9. Your big brother: Finn.

10. The guy you'd marry: Isa Isa Isa.

11. The two guys you'd have a threesome with: Huh. Never had a threesome. ...You know, I kind of want to have one with that Ed guy and his boyfriend.

12. The girl and guy you'd have a threesome with: Isa and Rita. Except I wouldn’t actually have it with Rita.

13. The guy you'd go clubbing with: Yeah, Jack again.

14. The guy you'd have angry hot sex with: …I can’t believe I’m saying David.

15. The girl you'd call after a break-up: Claire, to be honest.

16. The guy you'd have sex with when no one else is around: But I’m an exhibitionist, damn it!

17. The guy you'd have sex with when you're cheating on your hubby/boyfriend: I WOULD NEVER.

18. The guy you'd tell all your secrets: Brian. He’s just so sweet.

19. The person you'd commit a murder with: WHY IS JACK MY ANSWER FOR EVERYTHING?


20. The boy you'd go to the gym with: …I know I’m just doing us crazies and the hellseffingyeah crazies, but it’s actually that Ed guy.

21. Your shoulder to cry on: Nicole again.

22. The guy you'd ask to beat up your cheating boyfriend: …I’ve already made it totally clear that Isa can sleep with Rita, and I don’t think he’d cheat on me with anyone else. And if he did, I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t be nuts enough to beat him up for it.

23. The guy you'd always come back to: …I really need to answer this? Isa.

24. The guy you'd die for: ISA.

25. The guy who'd get you pregnant: …any surgeons around here?

Jul. 28th, 2008

Greg

^_^

 Well, I'm crazy anyway, so I figured, why not get some more names for what I've got? (Usual diagnoses: sociopath, obsessive compulsive, dependent, manic, depressed, ADHD.)

Disorder RatingInformation
Paranoid: Lowclick for info
Schizoid: Lowclick for info
Schizotypal: Very Highclick for info
Antisocial: Lowclick for info
Borderline: Moderateclick for info
Histrionic: Highclick for info
Narcissistic: Lowclick for info
Avoidant: Lowclick for info
Dependent: Very Highclick for info
Obsessive-Compulsive: Very Highclick for info

For some reason I can't stop giggling.

Jul. 27th, 2008

Isa

(no subject)

I admit I do not believe in Hell, but forever reason Jeff wished for me to take a test regarding it:

Purgatory Repenting Believers Very Low
Level 1 - Limbo Virtuous Non-Believers High
Level 2 Lustful Moderate
Level 3 Gluttonous Low
Level 4 Prodigal and Avaricious Very Low
Level 5 Wrathful and Gloomy Low
Level 6 - The City of Dis Heretics Moderate
Level 7 Violent Very Low
Level 8- the Malebolge Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers Low
Level 9 - Cocytus Treacherous Very Low

Jeff seemed rather dissappointed; apparantly it is "no fun" without a horrid ending.

Personally I thought it rather callous. He told me Nicole took this quite a while ago and was saddened when she had a 'very high' chance of getting to Level 3. But Jeff isn't always terribly sensitive, I'm afraid. 

He also had me take this:

Disorder RatingInformation
Paranoid: Moderateclick for info
Schizoid: Lowclick for info
Schizotypal: Highclick for info
Antisocial: Lowclick for info
Borderline: Lowclick for info
Histrionic: Lowclick for info
Narcissistic: Lowclick for info
Avoidant: Moderateclick for info
Dependent: Very Highclick for info
Obsessive-Compulsive: Moderateclick for info

Nicole took this as well--it said she was an avoidant and dependant. She didn't strike me as either, but perhaps I thought too well of her.
Jeff

Hee

Well, I made everyone else do it, so why not? :D

LevelWho are sent there?Score
Purgatory Repenting Believers Very Low
Level 1 - Limbo Virtuous Non-Believers Very Low
Level 2 Lustful Very High
Level 3 Gluttonous High
Level 4 Prodigal and Avaricious Low
Level 5 Wrathful and Gloomy Low
Level 6 - The City of Dis Heretics Extreme
Level 7 Violent Very High
Level 8- the Malebolge Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers High
Level 9 - Cocytus Treacherous High

Shame I don't believe in Hell.

Also, this was less fun, but:
 
Disorder RatingInformation
Paranoid: Highclick for info
Schizoid: Lowclick for info
Schizotypal: Moderateclick for info
Antisocial: Highclick for info
Borderline: Lowclick for info
Histrionic: Highclick for info
Narcissistic: Very Highclick for info
Avoidant: Lowclick for info
Dependent: Lowclick for info
Obsessive-Compulsive: Moderateclick for info

I'm narcissistic. Cool.
Rita

The Things I Do For My Daughter

An utter waste of time, but Jeff convinced her it would be funny, so she begged me. That ass. (Jeff, not my girl.)


Disorder RatingInformation
Paranoid: Moderateclick for info
Schizoid: Very Highclick for info
Schizotypal: Moderateclick for info
Antisocial: Very Highclick for info
Borderline: Highclick for info
Histrionic: Lowclick for info
Narcissistic: Lowclick for info
Avoidant: Lowclick for info
Dependent: Lowclick for info
Obsessive-Compulsive: Highclick for info
 
LevelWho are sent there?Score
Purgatory Repenting Believers Very Low
Level 1 - Limbo Virtuous Non-Believers Low
Level 2 Lustful Moderate
Level 3 Gluttonous Very Low
Level 4 Prodigal and Avaricious Very Low
Level 5 Wrathful and Gloomy Extreme
Level 6 - The City of Dis Heretics Very High
Level 7 Violent High
Level 8- the Malebolge Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers High
Level 9 - Cocytus Treacherous High

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