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tired1. Choose a few of your own characters. Five at the most.
2. Then make them answer the following questions
Rita is a workaholic stress-case who happens to have some compassion to her. Book Three Rita is still a workaholic stress case, but now she’s a Mommy and she doesn’t drink (Book One Rita borders on alcoholic.)
Jeff is an overly talkative cop and a bit of an asshole, albeit an outgoing and cheerful asshole. Book Three Jeff is overly talkative, outgoing, and cheerful, but he’s less of an asshole (still annoying as all fuck) and he now has one working eye.
Isa’s life has been shit. And he’s deathly lonely. That’s really all you need to know. Book Three Isa is just as compassionate and has had just as bad a life, but he has Jeff chattering to him constantly so the loneliness is cured.
Natana is sexy sex, but her body is not equipped for actual sex. She is, however, a great dancer.
Greg is bright and cheerful and loyal as a puppy, and to top it all off he is gloriously batshit.
How Old Are You?
Book One Rita: Early thirties
Book Three Rita: Nearly forty
Book One Jeff: Twenty-one, got a problem with that?
Book Three Jeff: Twenty-seven
Book One Isa: I am not certain…(As of 2008 he's twenty-four, but his age is based on actual events, so in 2009 he'd be twenty-five, in 2010 twenty-six, and so on. If the book ever gets published, it probably won't be until 2010 or even 2011, and that works for me because he's supposed to be closer to Rita's age than Jeff's.)
Book Three Isa: I don’t really know. Thirty? (Author says: thirty-one, but see above disclaimer. And as for why he aged seven years while Jeff aged six, Isa’s twenty-fifth birthday was in the second book.)
Natana: Nineteen. Been legal for over a year.
Greg: Eighteen
Height
Rita: 5’11”
Jeff: 5’7”, but I WILL RISE
Isa: I’ve never actually measured (5’9”-ish. He’d be six feet if he had been nourished properly.)
Natana: Six feet. *Smile*
Greg: Tall
You got any bad habits?
Rita: No. (She’s overworked. And in book one, she drinks too much coffee and lacks the patience to warm up food.)
Jeff: I have no idea what you’re talking about. Why would I have any bad habits? I mean, really. I’m not particularly sarcastic and I certainly don’t talk too much, in fact I consider myself rather quiet, don’t you?
Isa: I’ve never really had the opportunity to develop bad habits perse
Natana: I think about sex all the time. I’m not even kidding. And I break into dance or a run at random intervals, and always feel like touching people, and drape myself over people instead of sitting on chairs. Luckily, those are all very good habits.
Greg: Do I?
You a virgin?
Book One Rita: That’s none of your goddamn business
Book Three Rita: Oh, definitely. Ally came on a stork. (Ally=her daughter. Virgin=fuck no.)
Book One Jeff: *Smirk* Are you coming on to me?
Book Three Jeff: *Smirk* Are you coming on to me?
Book One Isa: What sort of question is that? I am, but it is hardly any of your concern.
Book Three Isa: No. What sort of question is that?
Natana: Only because I can’t have sex. *Grumble*
Greg: *Shyly* Uh-huh
Who's your Mate/Spouse?
Book One Rita: Like I have time for that.
Book Three Rita: None at the moment. *Glances at Isa*
Book One Jeff: Wouldn’t you like to know?
Book Three Jeff: *Grins big and hugs Isa, who stares at him like he’s nuts*
Book One Isa: None
Book Three Isa: Well, at the moment I’m not—Jeff, get off of me
Natana: None right now. Someday. Soon, maybe.
Greg: Just good friends right now.
Have any kids?
Book One Rita: *Glare* No
Book Three Rita: Yes. *Fond smile at Ally*
Book One Jeff: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Book Three Jeff: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Book One Isa: *Wistful* None of my own.
Book Three Isa: *Looks uncomfortable* Well, yes. She’s a charming girl, but—
Book Three Jeff: He won’t tell her he’s her father because apparently he’s ASHAMED. It’s sickening.
Book Three Isa: I also have Jeff. Surely he counts.
Natana: Can’t.
Greg: Nope.
Favorite Food?
Book One Rita: Pad thai
Book Two Rita: Dark chocolate
Book One Jeff: MEAT
Book Three Jeff: MEAT. Also, that pizza Isa makes without cheese.
Isa: It is not pizza.
Jeff: IT COUNTS
Book One Isa: I’m rather fond of dark chocolate, though I can’t really have it. I enjoy most foods.
Book Three Isa: *Longingly names some Kurdish dish, then adds that he enjoys most foods*
Natana: Biryani! And kukra no sak! And chicken tacos! And masala macchi!
Greg: Chinese food. Especially with chicken.
Favorite Ice Cream flavor?
Book One Rita: Why are you wasting my time with questions about ice cream?
Book Three Rita: My daughter’s favorite flavor is mint chocolate chip. We usually share, since she’s too young for much, even if it’s a kid’s scoop.
Jeff: Ugh, ice cream. I’m getting a toothache just thinking about it.
Isa: I’ve never had ice cream, actually.
Natana: Pistachio kulfi with cardamom.
Greg: I like a lot of flavors. Especially if there’s caramel.
Killed anyone?
Book One Rita: *Revolted look* No
Book Three Rita: No, but I’ve tried
Book One Jeff: Nope. Surprised, aren’t you?
Book Three Jeff: Unfortunately, I haven’t managed
Book One Isa: Never
Book One Jeff: Liar
Book One Isa: It’s true. I wouldn’t…
Book Three Isa: *Pained expression* I didn’t mean to…I didn’t realize…
Natana: I wish.
Greg: No, but people think I did.
Hate anyone?
Book One Rita: People who ask stupid questions like this. And that cop.
Book Three Rita: Those fucking agents making Isa’s life miserable. As if he doesn’t have enough misery.
Book One Jeff: Terrorists. *Glares at Isa*
Book Three Jeff: I’m with Rita on this.
Book One Isa: No
Book Three Isa: No
Natana: Homophobes piss me off. And racists. Bigots in general.
Greg: *Growl* My dad
Any secrets?
Book One Rita: Fuck off.
Book Three Rita: Most people don’t know who Ally’s dad is.
Book One Jeff: *Sweet smile*
Book Three Jeff: Not really. My identity and stuff, but some people know.
Book One Isa: Some.
Book Three Isa: Ally does not know I am her father.
Love anyone?
Book One Rita: No
Book Three Rita: Of course I love Ally
Book Three Jeff: And Isa
Book Three Rita: Shut up
Book One Jeff: MEAT MEAT MEAT
Book Three Jeff: Isa
Book Three Isa: *Rolls eyes*
Book Three Jeff: And Ally. She’s such a little cutie.
Book One Isa: Lots of people. My Brothers and Nathanial and Jeff’s dog and a few others.
Book One Jeff: Like your fellow TERRORISTS? Oh, wait, those are your ‘Brothers.’
Book Three Isa: Well, I love Ally, of course. And Jeff and Rita, I suppose. And Toby and Ishmael. And I still love all the people I’ve been separated from, or who have died.
Natana: Daddy
Greg: My sister and my friends
What is your job?
Book One Rita: Executive of Finance Management
Book Three Rita: I was a journalist. I’m on a leave of absence from the actual journalist job, but I’m owner and manager of the city newspaper, and Chief Editor of the state’s main newspaper.
Book One Jeff: Cop
Book Three Jeff: Not a dime or a job to my name
Book One Isa: I can’t have a job in this country. I used to build houses, and I’m a healer, but I never did either for money
Book Three Isa: I’ve been a firefighter and I’ve worked at some restaurants. Right now I’m taking care of Nikki.
Natana: I get paid for dancing. Not much, but what college student gets paid much?
Greg: None
Boy or girl?
Rita: Woman
Jeff: Slime. And boy.
Isa: Man
Natana: Funny story…
Greg: Boy
What do you do to relax?
Book One Rita: I don’t need to relax! I do drink sometimes, to help myself sleep, but relaxing is a waste of time
Book Three Rita: *Shrug* I swing sometimes
Book One Jeff: Are you kidding? My life is so relaxing. I get to shoot things and eat at a diner
Book Three Jeff: Annoy Rita ^_*
Book One Isa: I walk most days. I used to help garden.
Book Three Isa: Play piano or play with Nikki, or listen to Jeff chatter.
Natana: Dance. Run. I have other things in mind, most days.
Greg: No stress here! *g*
What song do you think would best describe yourself?
Rita: This is the stupidest question in the world
Jeff: I’ve always been partial to Play That Funky Music, White Boy
Isa: I don’t believe I know many songs in your language.
Natana: Sexy sexy sexy
Greg: I’m too crazy to fit songs
Any hidden talents or something no one else knows about you?
Rita: Talent. What bullshit. Either you work hard or you’ve got nothing.
Jeff: I think everyone knows how well I can shoot.
Isa: A few.
Natana: People know. *Wink* Oh, but I can transport people, and me, when I dance. Most people don’t know that part.
Greg: I can talk to spirits. I used to be able to see them.
What color is your hair?
Book One Rita: Dark blonde
Book Three Rita: Dyed black
Book One Jeff: Plain ole brown! =D
Book Three Jeff: *Grumble* Dyed blonde *grumble* I MISS MY HAIR, DAMN IT.
Isa: Black
Natana: Dark brown. It looks black.
What's your sexual orientation?
Rita: Straight.
Jeff: NO SUCH THING.
Isa: I prefer women…I haven’t had many (Book One: any) relationships, though.
Natana: Just boys for me, or maybe other hermaphrodites, but I’ve never actually met one.
Greg: I like everybody.
suicidalRita: I lived in Thailand for four months. Miniskirts weren't considered mini.
Jeff: What about miniskirts so tight you need zippers up the side because from the back it would highlight—*here Rita was kind enough to hit me over the head with a briefcase.*
Rita: Could you please focus on your boyfriend's ass instead of mine?
Jeff: Isa looks like porn in black jeans. BAGGY black jeans. Besides, he LOVES that little sidezip skirt
*Here Isa has a nosebleed and lies about it*
Isa: I find that skirt extremely inappropriate, actually.
Jeff: Oh, but you know which one I'm talking about!
Natana: Give up, Hon. Your boyfriend's clearly not letting this go.
Isa: I have never lost an argument with Jeff.
Jeff: Well, there was that one time...
Isa: What one time?
Jeff: The time you were moaning too hard to keep arguing
Isa: Your...method...was hardly fair for an argument.
Jeff: Hey, YOU could use it anytime and I'd never complain.
Isa: If a suicidal person offered to let you kill them, would it be all right for them to kill you?
Now, obviously this is NOTHING AT ALL related to suicide. Well, putting the conversation up may be.
nostalgicA. If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone? Why haven't you told them yet?
I don’t know. It would be nice if Nikki knew I was her father, but the last thing I would want is to tell her and then die. I want Jeff and Rita to understand how grateful I am for what they’ve done for me, and let Jeff know I would never leave him. I’ve tried to tellt both of those, but they’d just tell me I was silly. There are things I regret having not told Nicole, but the reason I haven’t is rather obvious.
B. Would you accept $1,000,000 to leave the county and never set foot in it again?
If Rita would bring Nikki, I would love to leave. I know I can’t go back where I was born, though I miss it, but I still want to go somewhere.
C. You are given the power to kill people simply by thinking of their deaths and twice repeating the word "good-bye." People would die a natural death and no one would suspect you. Are there any situations in which you would use this power? (If you can imagine yourself killing someone indirectly, could you still see yourself doing it if you had to look into the person's eyes and stab the person to death? Have you ever genuinely wanted to kill someone or wished them dead?)
I could never. I’ve killed, and I still hate myself for it. (I’m sure I could imagine it, but I could never do it. I admit, I have. )
D. What would constitute a "perfect" evening for you?
Yes, there are things I would change, but I cannot change them. Jeff and Nikki and Rita are here, the food is plentiful, there is a couch and a piano and every evening I am warm and Jeff is beside me. Perfect does not exist, but joy does. And I have joy.
E. Would you rather be extremely successful professionally and have a tolerable yet unexciting private life, or have an extremely happy private life and only a tolerable and uninspiring professional life? (Since so many people place great emphasis on a happy private life, why do people often wind up putting more energy into their professional lives? If you feel that your private life is more important, do your priorities support this? Are you simply unwilling to admit that work is more important? Do you use work as a substitute? Do you hope professional success will somehow magically lead to personal happiness?)
I don’t understand this obsession with money and career. A tolerable professional life would be lovely. An extremely happy private life is what I have, and I have not even imagined as much. In short, I’m being offered more than I have, or want. (Again, I do not understand. Perhaps they do. I do not; it hardly did as much for Rita.)
F. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one ability or quality, what would it be?
Jeff’s teleportation suggestion does sound nice. Or…
I can heal bodies, and I can rebuild houses, but I cannot heal minds or souls, nor can I rebuild lives. I don’t know what ability would let me do such a thing, and I don’t know if it’s within my right to do so, but…I wish I could.
G. You have the chance to meet someone with whom you can have the most satisfying love imaginable - the stuff of dreams. Sadly, you know that in six months the person will die. Knowing that pain that would follow, would you still want to meet that person and fall in love? What if you knew your lover would not die, but instead would betray you? (In love, is intensity or permanence more important? How much do you expect from someone who loves you? What would make you feel betrayed by your mate - indifference? Dishonesty? Infidelity?)
No. I have had a relationship that ended and I do not regret it at all. I have had loved ones who died and I treasure their memory. But I would not willingly form a new relationship knowing it would end in death. And there is too much at risk for me to be with someone who would betray me. (I rather prefer permanence; I could not be in a relationship that I knew would be a mere casual game, however enjoyable it was. I’ve never had expectations; I never expected I’d fall in love, and somehow I stumbled upon people who defy expectations. I would feel betrayed by infidelity, hurt and surprised by indifference, and my response to dishonesty would depend on the lie.)
H. Do you prefer being around men or women? Do your closest friends tend to be men or women?
I am used to being around men, and Jeff and my Brothers are men, but I do not have anything against women.
I. Would you be willing to murder an innocent person if it would end hunger in the world? (Would it torment you more to have the blood of an innocent person on your hands or to know you let millions of people die? What do you think of people who achieve great things by compromising their principles? Many are will to give their own lives but not to take the life of another; is anything so important you would sacrifice your very soul for it?)
I…I wish I could. I wish. But I couldn’t. (It torments me enough to have vile blood on my hands; the blood of an innocent I could not tolerate. I don’t understand how people can abandon their principles so easily. I would sacrifice my soul for my daughter.)
J. What is you most treasured memory?
I have many fond memories, but I cannot cling to those.
K. If you knew there would be a nuclear war in one week, what would you do?
I don’t know.
L. What is the greatest accomplishment of your life? Is there anything you hope to do that is even better?
Escaping from prison. I would like to find a way to help someone; I have always helped people, and now I have no way to.
M. One would be the one material item you would save during a fire?
I don’t suppose I could save the piano.
N. You are offered $1,000,000 for the following act: before you are ten pistols - only one of which is loaded. You must pick up one of the pistols, point it at your forehead, and pull the trigger. If you can walk away you do so a millionaire. Would you accept the risk?
Money is not worth a life.
O. If you could choose the manner of your death, what would it be? (Would you die a hero's death, die a martyr to some great cause, die in a natural catastrophe, or die peacefully? Why is it so tempting to have death catch us in our sleep?)
I have always thought that, some day, faced with an innocent death, a soul unready to die, I would revive someone at the cost of my own life. It is rather foolish of me to put this here when I know how Jeff will react, but it is true. And how else can I die? I do not want to starve. Nothing else would kill me. (A peaceful death is a glorious thought…any thought of peace is glorious.)
P. For what in your life do you feel most grateful?
So many things. My Brothers, though they are not with me anymore. Nicole, though she is gone. Jeff and Rita and Toby and Ishmael. Of course, I am most grateful for Nikki.
Q. How forgiving are you?
I have never had to forgive someone, because I have never blamed anyone for something. Even the destruction of the country I come from cannot be the burden of one conscience.
R. When you tells a story, do you often exaggerate or embellish it? If so, why?
Never.
S. How much do you feel in control of the course of your life?
No one can really control their lives. They can only try.
T. Is it easy for you to ask for help when you need it? Will you ask for help?
I would not be typing right now, were it not for the help of others. Most likely, I would be in a cage. Or I would have starved before I was ever placed in a cage.
U. Would you like to be famous? In what way?
I would rather not.
V. What are your most compulsive habits? Do you regularly struggle to break those habits?
Do I have compulsive habits? It pains me to see pain that I cannot heal, but I do not consider this a habit.
W. What do you strive for most in your life: accomplishment, security, love, power, excitement, knowledge, or something else?
Freedom. And security would be nice.
X. How easily embarrassed are you?
Certainly I have been embarrassed, but it is rare.
Y. Does the fact that you has never done something before increase or decrease its appeal to you?
It depends. I have no fear of doing things I have no experience with, but I do not seek out activities just because they are new.
Z. How many different sexual partners have you had? Would you prefer to have had more or fewer?
Two. While I would like to say I have only loved one person, the fact is that I would not take back either relationship. I care for Rita a great deal, and if it were not for my being with her, Nikki would never have been born. And Jeff is…wonderful.
soreHis name is Isa, which is technically an Arabic name, but the meaning is derived from the Hebrew word Asa, which means healer.
What is your character’s religion? How common is this religion? What are some rules (ie veils in Islam or dietary restrictions) associated with this religion? How closely does he follow them?
Not all Muslim women wear veils, but—Isa is a Yezidi, which is about as uncommon as it gets. They’re pretty much extinct, if you can use that term in regards to a religious group. Some rules are not eating lettuce and not wearing blue. He would like to follow these, but being dirt poor and a refugee/fugitive to boot, he can’t. When he is able to choose what he eats and wears, he does follows the rules.
What is your character’s ethnicity? How has this affected his life?
Isa is a Kurd, which it is safe to say affected him a whole lot during the Kurdish genocide.
What is your character’s level of education?
He was taught by other members of this group (another of my characters prefers the word ‘cult’) so he didn’t get typical primary school to secondary school to college education. He did, however, get a good education, focusing on math and healing and history and physiology. This ended when he was seventeen, since he was captured. He still has a fairly large desire to learn.
Describe your character’s political beliefs.
Isa is a socialist and a pacifist. He’s skeptical of governments and stubbornly against killing anyone, including terrorists. His firm commitment to human rights and stuff like equality probably seems naïve given how shitty his life has been, but he isn’t naïve. He doesn’t believe the world as it is right now is about to become a utopia anytime soon. But he also has, cheesy as it sounds, a deep love for humankind. And look at it this way: it’s either that or suicide.
What part of the world does your country come from?
The Middle East. Specifically Iraq. More specifically, Iraqi Kurdistan, though he’s a nomad so I’m sure he’s been all over Iraq.
What is the primary religion of this country?
Islam. Specifically Shia Islam.
What is the primary ethnicity of this country?
Arab.
How long did your character live in this country?
I don’t so much know. Like I said, he was seventeen when he was first captured, but his healing powers weren’t discovered until after that, and given the war and all he was probably used within the country to heal. I think he was transferred out (well, sold) around 2004, but neither he nor I know his exact age at the time.
What job did your character hold while living in this country?
The members of the group were nomadic and socialists and did not believe in paltry stuff like making a profit. Isa was brought into it as a really little child, so he he’s never held a paid job. He went around with the other members (his “Brothers”) rebuilding houses that had been destroyed during the ethnic cleansing. Isa, who has healing powers, also did a lot of healing. I’d consider both of these jobs, even if he wasn’t paid.
What country does your character currently live in?
The United States of Amrika. No, wait, America.
What is the primary religion of this country?
Again? Christianity. Don’t ask me what type of Christianity because I don’t know.
What is the primary ethnicity of this country?
Caucasian.
What circumstances brought your character to this country?
After Isa’s healing powers were discovered, he was used as a tool. He managed to escape and basically stowed away on the first ship he could find. Then he illegally went from country to country until he was out of harm’s way.
What are his or her three favorite changes?
1) The lack of daily air raids.
2) The unlikelihood of illegal house demolitions.
3) The plentiful water and electricity.
What does he or she miss about his own country?
1) The food. Isa has unfortunately found himself in a city where there is little ethnic cuisine, and certainly nothing Kurdish. And even if the cuisine were the same, the food just tastes different. Also, the only times he hasn’t eaten family style were the times in solitary confinement.
2) The feeling of brotherhood. Isa is a very lonely person. He’s pretty reserved himself, but he craves human contact. Aside from, again, solitary confinement, he’s used to being around people. He’s also used to expressions of physical affection between men, and we all know how THAT’S perceived in the US. Since he isn’t about to go up and throw his arms around some random guy, he’s pretty isolated.
3) The people. Specifically, his Brothers.
What does he or she not understand about the new country?
- The incredible amount of food people waste. Isa never wastes food. Granted, he rarely has food to waste.
- The way women dress. Iraq is a pretty secular place (well, was) and it isn’t like women went around fully veiled, but they didn’t go around in miniskirts and midriff-bearing tops.
- The fact that there are no visible stars. It’s a mix of pollution and lights being on all night, but it’s totally foreign to him.
What is his current job?
As an illegal immigrant, he has a lack of options. He works in a diner; he's underpaid, but he's just grateful to be working. Later he becomes a firefighter, but he has to quit after a bad fire in which he heals a bunch of people, because then he has to run like heck lest someone figures out how he managed to do that.
What acquaintances had he made since he has arrived? How did they meet? What is their job? What about them is unique to the culture of the new country?
- Rita Hason. They met at a bar. She is a workaholic businesswoman with a coffee addiction, which seems pretty darn American to me.
- Jeff Tobias. Their first meeting consisted of Jeff trying to arrest Isa. As that may suggest, Jeff is a cop. He considers math a form of brainwashing, does that count?
- Nicole. She ran into him with her car. She’s currently unemployed, though she wants to be a music teacher. As for uniquely American…well, her vegetarianism is definitely not what you’d see in the Middle East, but you see it in India, so that doesn’t count. I don’t know, really.
tired
One of the first duties of the physician is to educate the masses not to take medicine.
Sir William Osler (1849 - 1919)
Disbelief in magic can force a poor soul into believing in government and business.
Tom Robbins (1936 - )
You can't separate peace from freedom because no one can be at peace unless he has his freedom.
Patriotism is the willingness to kill and be killed for trivial reasons.
Will Rogers (1879 - 1935)
contemplative| Purgatory | Repenting Believers | Very Low |
| Level 1 - Limbo | Virtuous Non-Believers | High |
| Level 2 | Lustful | Moderate |
| Level 3 | Gluttonous | Low |
| Level 4 | Prodigal and Avaricious | Very Low |
| Level 5 | Wrathful and Gloomy | Low |
| Level 6 - The City of Dis | Heretics | Moderate |
| Level 7 | Violent | Very Low |
| Level 8- the Malebolge | Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers | Low |
| Level 9 - Cocytus | Treacherous | Very Low |
| Disorder | Rating | Information |
| Paranoid: | Moderate | click for info |
| Schizoid: | Low | click for info |
| Schizotypal: | High | click for info |
| Antisocial: | Low | click for info |
| Borderline: | Low | click for info |
| Histrionic: | Low | click for info |
| Narcissistic: | Low | click for info |
| Avoidant: | Moderate | click for info |
| Dependent: | Very High | click for info |
| Obsessive-Compulsive: | Moderate | click for info |